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Cat Chat By Chris Stalker V.N.

Welcome to Cat Chat!

Welcome to the first ‘Cat Chat’ column from your new ‘Cat News Reporter’! It is great to be writing for Our Cats once again and I hope you will help me to develop this column into an interactive article in every issue.

In order to keep this a fresh and entertaining part of Our Cats, I’d like to hear from you, the reader – please send me your cat related news, views, comments, stories, hints, tips, photographs and even cat jokes. You can contact me via ‘snail mail’ addressed to Chris Stalker, Cat News Reporter, c/o Our Cats, 5 James Leigh St, Manchester, M1 5NF or by email to catnewsreporter@yahoo.co.uk

I will try to reply to you within 7–10 days, however, I am sorry that I am unable to accept telephone calls or mail sent directly to my home address. I look forward to hearing from you, very soon!

Farewell Cloud
I was saddened to hear that a well known Burmese, GRAND CHAMPION MAYRLING RED CLOUD 27d, had recently died. Cloud was bred by Annette & David Quincey in 1987 and this fine fellow appears on many pedigrees of today’s winning show cats. I am proud to say that my own cats ‘go back’ to this lovely boy.

Grand Champion Mayrling Red Cloud (27d)

How True is this?
My thanks to Lynne Dixon, for passing on the following two little gems….
Letter to my pets
When I say to move, it means to go someplace else, not to switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in my way. The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. All other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note that placing your paw print in the middle of MY plate and food does not stake a claim - making it YOUR plate and food.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn’t help in your quest to reach the bottom first, because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think that I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort.

Dogs and cats actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to one another, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, and try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the edge of the door and try to pull it open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Honest.

Also, I have been using the bathroom by myself for quite some time - canine or feline attendance is not mandatory.

Finally, I can’t stress this one enough - kiss me, THEN go smell the other dog’s/cat’s behind. To pacify you, my dear companions, I have posted the following notice on our front door:
Rules for non-pet owners who visit and then complain about our pets
1. The pets live here - You don’t.

2. If you don’t want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture..... (That’s why it’s called “fur”niture.)

3. To you, our pets are just animals. To us, they are an adopted son/daughter who happens to be hairy, walks on all fours and doesn’t speak clearly.

4. Dogs and cats are better than kids because:
—— they don’t ask for money all the time
—— they are easier to train
—— they usually come when called
—— they don’t hang out with drug-using friends
—— they don’t need a gazillion dollars for a college education, and
—— if they get pregnant, you can sell the children.

1st Burmese Male Neuter takes the Imperial Title

Imperial Grand Premier Sylps Hercules

An excited Teresa and Mark Weale contacted me to tell me that Gr Pr Sylps Hercules, aka ‘Ben’, got his final Imperial certificate at the Southern Counties Cat Club show on Saturday, 28th January. He was bred by Lindsey Britton and the late Jackie Chapman. Well done to ‘Ben’!

A Bias?
As many of you know, Burmese are ‘my breed’ but I make no apologies for including two Burmese on this page – if you want to get a fair balance of breed news in this column, then get in touch and tell me! However news on this page is not intended to replace your ‘Show Brag’ advertisements!

Shy at Shropshire
I caught this little fellow (right), holding his eyes tight shut, on camera during my first assignment as Cat News reporter on 11th February at the Shropshire Cat Club Show; he is Miss K Hartley’s Matrix Brahma and I did get another photo of him, which you can see in the next issue of Our Cats.

“You can’t see me!”

It was a great show with a superb entry. Our Cats’ MD, Vince Hogan, was also at the show and he took some photographs too, so it should be a ‘bumper’ feature!

That’s all for now folks! Please get writing and we’ll meet here in two weeks!