Cinema Cat
I went to the cinema to see “The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe”. In front of me was a man and he had a cat on his knee. I was amazed to see the cat really appreciate the film. He was thrilled, amused, moved during the film and during the last 20 minutes he was reduced to tears. After the film ended I said to the man, “that’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen. Your cat really enjoyed the film”.
The man turned to me and said, “Yes, it is. He didn’t like the book at all”.
The Old Ones Are Always The Best!
What is a cat’s favourite colour? - Purrr-ple!
Who helped Cinderella’s cat go to the ball? - Her furry godmother!
How does a cat count? - One, mew, three!
What newspapers do cats read? - The Daily Mews!
What drinks milk, meows, and has eight legs? - An octo-puss!
What is a cat’s favourite party game? - Mews-ical chairs!
What do you say to your cat when you go out? - Have a mice day!
How do you know when your cat has been using your computer? - Because your mouse
has teeth marks on it!
What do baby cats wear? - Dia-purrs!
What has more lives than a cat? - A frogs - it croaks all the time!
What is the difference between a cat and a comma? - One has the paws before the claws
and the other has the clause before the pause!
Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? - There are too many cheetahs!
What is a cat’s favourite song? - Three Blind Mice!
What is a cat’s way of keeping law and order? - Claw enforcement!
Why did the litter of communist kittens become capitalists? - Because they finally opened
their eyes.
What do you call tabloid stories about cats? - Hiss and Tell!
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a cat? - A big furry creature that purrs
while it sits on your lap and squashes you!
What does a cat do when it gets mad? - It has a hissy fit!
A Final Pub Joke
A lion walked into a pub and stood for a while at the bar deciding what to order. The barman said, “What’s with the big pause?” The lion said, “Are you implying that my feet are too big?”
OUR CATS READER’S COMPETITION
Five Cat Care Sets To Be Won!
Recent research tells us that - amongst other benefits - owning a pet improves our feelings of wellbeing, increases our chances of making friends, gives us a lower risk of cardiovascular disease and improves school attendance rates amongst our children.
However, we need to ensure such positive relationships between families and pets remain healthy, which is why it’s important to keep your dogs and cats free from worms and fleas to avoid serious health risks to humans from cross contamination.
Many people do not realise that some parasitic worms can cause disease in humans - for example, Human Toxocariasis (which can cause blindness) can be contracted by swallowing worm eggs, inadvertently picked up from the environment or when you simply stroke your dog’s fur.
As a result, the BSAVA (British Small Animal Veterinary Association), recommend worming frequently depending on the lifestyle of your pet. As a minimum it is recommended to worm four times a year. Drontal is one of the only wormers that controls all common intestinal worms in a single dose in cats and dogs.
To help promote regular worming of your pets, Bayer has produced two high quality pet care kits - one for cats, one for dogs - which include animal bedding, toys, treats and food bowls.
If you’d like to win a kit for the special cat or dog in your family’s life, answer the question below, and write your name and address on a postcard or sealed envelope (stating your preferred kit) and send it to:
Drontal Pet Care Kit Competition, Harrison Cowley Limited, Dragon Court, 27 Macklin Street, London WC2B 5LX.
The winners will be the first five names drawn from the assembled mail after the closing date of 31 January 2006.
The current Drontal range consists of Drontal Plus for dogs, Drontal Plus XL for larger breeds of dog, Drontal Plus Flavour, Drontal Cat Tablets, Drontal Cat XL and Drontal Puppy Suspension. For more information on worming your cat or dog, visit Bayer’s website - www.stopwormsdead.co.uk - or talk to your local vet.
COMPETITION QUESTION:
How many times a year should you worm your pet?
(a) once, (b) twice, (c) three times, (d) four times
ANSWERS TO P.D.F PAGE 1
Answers:
Missing Person - 1 Chocolate, 2 Sphynx, 3 Imperial, 4 Catnip, 5 Aslan, 6 Supreme, 7 Agouti, 8 Maastricht, 9 Orlando, 10 Tonkinese, 11 Nine, 12 Our Cats. Missing Person - Chris Stalker.
Famous Cats - 1B, 2I, 3E, 4K, 5D, 6G, 7F, 8A, 9L, 10J, 11C, 12H
Nonogram - Maine Coon
Cat Words - 1 Caterer, 2 Vacation, 3 Scatter, 4 Decathlon, 5 Secateurs, 6 Intricate, 7 Location, 8 Dedicated, 9 Catarrh, 10 Placate
Big Cat Wordsearch - Chinchilla |
