This page includes articles of interest as well as items of an amusing nature. Please send your contributions (for possible publication) into Our Cats to the usual address, marked “The Cheshire Cat”.
FANCY FINGER FOOD FOR KITTENS
It’s early Summer, warm and balmy. The kittens are now six weeks old but only three of the four can barely be bothered to stop running long enough to eat. You know how it is; you’ve tried them with every thing in the house but ‘no thanks Mum, not today’. Well after more than ten years of breeding I have finally learned not to worry about it too much. Ok - they may be a little on the small side, but they are plump and hellishly active! I know, thinks me unto myself, I’ll try them with some tasty freshly roasted minced chicken to tempt their tiny teeth. Here we go:-
1. Mike away on a conference overnight (mobile switched off); relatives all abroad; friends out of town or out of reach; friendly neighbour gone away for the weekend.
2. Self - very casually dressed because ... see note 1.
3. Early evening - watching birds in garden while using electric hand-mincer (remember that phrase) to mince roasted chicken that I have just torn up with my fingers - so nice and greasy.
4. Chicken blocks mincer.
5. Hold mincer in right hand while idiotic left hands proceeds to unblock blades.
6. Hands greasy, handle slips.
7. OOPS - right hand instinctively grips handle, in so doing turns mincer back on.
8. ***—^88%UU* !!!
9. Trying not to drop mincer (why??) right hand puts mincer carefully down and switches off wall socket (rather too late) while left hand flails around re-decorating most of the kitchen in a vibrant shade of crimson.
10. Desperately try to shoo intrigued adults cats out of kitchen whilst laying a trail of vermilion spots to show any stray visitors how to get from the kitchen door to the sink.
11. Don’t look.
12. Look.
13. Feel a trifle queasy.
14. Run cold tap and insert colourful left forefinger into icy dagger-strewn stream pouring from pink spotted tap.
15. Yelp a wee bit.
16 Grab towel from other side of kitchen ensuring that microwave and several kitchen cupboards now match the ongoing décor revision.
17. Towel suddenly changes colour.
18. Grab kitchen paper roll. Used to be white - now not.
19 Swathe forefinger in yards of paper towel (logic being that it’s probably going to be easier to soak paper off finger than cotton by the time I get to a nurse) - cool headed or what?
20. Dash upstairs, can’t possibly be seen outside of the home dressed in such scruff-order.
21. Whilst feverishly trying to zip and button-up jeans with one hand, deliberate on the pros and cons of taking a taxi or driving oneself.
22. A wee bit dizzy now, and appendage is beginning to throb for England. Decide to drive oneself - after all one has to get back home again and one can’t be waiting for taxis for ages.
23. 15 minutes later arrive outside surgery - amazed that it is still open. Don’t know how I got here - must have beamed.
24. Exit transport and do an impression of Toulouse Lautrec.
25. After 5 yards realise that one is doing an impression of Toulouse Lautrec and stand oneself up.
26. Reach head of receptionist’s queue and say in a small voice ‘I’m so sorry to bother you at this time of day, without an appointment, but I’ve caught my finger in a blender and its beginning to hurt a little - is it possible for a doctor to see me or should I make an appointment?’ Honestly, that’s what one said! That’s English phlegm for you.
When all was said and done the wound was not as bad as it might have been and the cup of tea was very good. Left surgery with a pile of painkillers and the finger stitched and wrapped to the size of a chef’s hat. The worst of it all was that once I’d got back home I had to un-decorate the kitchen (took ages) and then mince a fresh batch of chicken for my carefree kittens.
…. AND NOT ONE OF THE LITTLE BLIGHTERS ATE A SINGLE MORSEL.
Cheers, Linda Vousden, Mymystic Tonkinese
WHAT DID THE JUDGE MEAN? By Marianne Brett
It can sometimes be difficult to understand your cat’s show report, especially if you are new to showing. What exactly DID the judge mean by “unsound coat” or “open expression”? The following is meant as a general guide to understanding show reports; phrases and terms used as well as common abbreviations. It is by no means definitive, as there are probably as many phrases as there are judges.
ADTRESH ARATHORN, a Brown Spotted Bengal MN, was shown at the Supreme last November, winning 1st Open & IC. Owned and bred by Richard Stone.
A
AA: Any Age
A: Absent
AD: Adult
AOC: Any Other Colour
AOV: Any Other Variety
B
BIS: Best in Show
Bite: The alignment of the cat’s teeth
BOB: Best of Breed
Bonnett ears, bonneting: Ears leaning forward and outwards giving the impression of the cat wearing a bonnet (Incorrect ear carriage)
BOV: Best of Variety
Break: Dip in the profile in between eyes and nose in certain breeds
Brow: Forehead. Can be too flat or too heavy for instance, a very heavy brow would make the cat appear somewhat gorilla like
Brush: Furry tail
C
CC: Challenge Certificate, can also mean Cat Club
CH: Champion. Some judges also use CH as an abbreviation instead of CC.
Cheeks, full or apple: Rounded, wide cheeks
Chin; firm, weak, strong etc: A weak chin would not be prominent enough, a very strong chin would jut out.
Close coat: Flat laying, close to the body, sleek
CNH: Can Not Handle
CNJ: Can Not Judge – variation of CNH
Cold colour: Colour tone not intense and vibrant enough
D
Dome: Top of head in between ears, should be dome shaped in certain breeds
F
F: Female
FN: Female Neuter
G
GCC: Grand Challenge Certificate
Ghost markings: Faint tabby markings that should not be there and which may fade with age, such as in some self colours and Smokes for instance.
GPC: Grand Premier Certificate
GR.CH.: Grand Champion
GR.PR.: Grand Premier
H
Hot: Colour too intense/deep, typical for creams
I
IC: Intermediate Certificate, awarded to cats of Provisional status
K
Kink: Bend or bump in tail typically at tip, but can be anywhere, of varying degrees
Knickerboxers, knickers: Long fur on hindlegs
L
Leather: The hairless skin on the nose
Level bite: Correct bite, where bottom and upper jaw meet perfectly straight
LH: Longhair
M
M: Male
McTabby: Mackerel Tabby
MN: Male Neuter
N
N/A: Not Awarded
NBIS: Nominated for Best in Show
Nose rolls off at tip: The very end of the nose is curved (incorrect)
O
Off centre bite: Lower jaw slightly twisted to one side, making the bite misaligned
Open coat: Coat not sleek, often not very dense
Open ears: The inside of the ears can be viewed when looking at the cat from the front
Open expression, open type: The opposite of ultra or extreme faces in Persians and Exotics. The nose is placed below the eyes.
Overshot: The upper jaw is further forward than the lower (incorrect)
P
PC: Premier Certificate
Pinched muzzle, pinch: Narrow muzzle, as if pinched together. Sometimes seen in teething kittens.
PR: Premier
R
Res: Reserve
Retrousse profile: Tip of nose tilted upwards
RGCC: Reserve Grand Challenge Certificate
RGPC: Reserve Grand Premier Certificate
Roll off: See “Nose rolls off at tip”
Ruff: Long fur on chest
S
Shading: Darker colour, often appearing with age, on otherwise pale body in pointed breeds
Side class: The commonly used name for miscellaneous classes
SLH: Semi Longhair
SOP: Standard of Points
Sound coat/colour: Even colouring
Sup: Supreme
SUP.GR.CH.: Supreme Grand Champion, title only to be won by Best in Show Adult at Supreme Show. Also Sup. Gr. Pr. etc.
T
Trousers: Long fur on hindlegs
U
UK GCC: UK Grand Challenge Certificate, only awarded at the Supreme show
UK GPC: UK Grand Premier Certificate, as above
UK.GR.CH.: UK Grand Champion, title only to be attained at the Supreme Show
UK.GR.PR.: UK Grand Premier, as above
Ultra: Expression used for extreme type in Persians and Exotics; where the nose is situated in between the eyes
Undershot: Lower jaw and teeth protruding further than upper – incorrect bite
Unsound coat/colour: Uneven, may show hairs of wrong colour etc.
W
W/C: Wrong colour
Wedge: Shape of head in some breeds such as Siamese
W/H: Withheld
WNH: Will Not Handle, variation of CNH
W/P: Wrong Pattern
